March 17, 2016 Harriet Brookes

Considering an open relationship? Right & Wrong…

Do you know what exactly is an open relationship and have you ever thought to have this kind of relationship with your partner?

Having sex with someone besides your partner seems like it would automatically top the “things that count as cheating” list, right? Not so if you’re in an open relationship.

There’s a lot of confusion about what is and what isn’t an open relationship. Some people who are in long-distance relationships say they’re in an open relationship but an open relationship acknowledges that couples can have their needs met by other people…

The truth is that many people are curious about the idea of polyamory and open relationships where partners remain together yet have the freedom to see other people… So of you are curious about the type of open relationship let’s see if it’s right for you and what is all about…

First of all, be honest with yourself when it comes to deciding on an open relationship. What are your reasons for considering other partners? Are you just curious or do you feel that it would add something to your life and current relationship? Or are you seeking non-monogamy because you are dissatisfied with your current relationship? Also be honest with your own feelings. Do you think you can love more than one person at a time?

Before you even consider an open relationship, consider your current one. Don’t just go out and start an affair.  Building new relationships don’t make much sense if you are already experiencing troubles with the one you have. On the other hand, maybe it’s something you both want. Perhaps you remain together simply for financial or practical reasons but agree to see other people. It all depends on your individual situation.

Being “open” is not like being single. When you’re single you can choose to sleep with or flirt with whomever you want. In an open relationship you have boundaries and agreements established with your partners, and your choices also should reflect their needs and desires. It certainly is possible to “cheat” in an open relationship — by going back on an agreement or lying.

It is very important to discuss what the limits and goals for the open relationship should be and establish ground rules about how far each partner can go and also the very serious thing about protection. However you must remember that communication will be the absolute key to making the relationship successful.

Finally, open relationships are about choosing what’s important to you and working to live, love, process, argue, and be upset in healthy ways that make you feel empowered. Such choices make any relationship — whether open or monogamous — honest and meaningful. 😉  😀 


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