Most people think that dating with divorced people is not such a good idea… but dating may not only be limited to singles or the desperate out there. People recently separated or going through a divorce may also be on the dating scene. If you find yourself interested in dating a divorced man, here are some things that you need to consider.
Divorced man getting into the dating scene may have different reasons for doing so after a failed marriage. If you are about to date a divorced man, it pays to uncover what his motives are. Recently divorced men are not getting into the dating scene in order to start a new relationship. A lot of them are into it for fun. They may not always be keen on starting another relationship challenge after going through the trauma of a divorce. Women should try to determine whether the motives for dating are similar to their own.
Understanding why the man divorced is a must if you think that your relationship may go from casually dating to serious. It’s not bad asking him why his marriage failed. Ask what he learned from the relationship and what he wants in the future from a potential partner. But although you should make yourself available for him to talk to, don’t try to play the role of therapist.
Divorce is a major life change that may affect many areas of life. Show understanding when it comes to his lifestyle changes. This may mean showing flexibility when he needs to handle a new situation. For example, instead of expecting that he’ll take you out every Saturday night, understand that some weekends are only for his kids…
One more thing you need to understand is that his ex-wife will always be apart of his life story. He may still be in contact with his ex or he may have friends and family that are still in contact with her. Even if he has no contact with his ex, you may run into people when you are out together that bring up his ex or ask him questions about the divorce.
Also, a divorced man may be more cautious or even opposed to the idea of getting married again. This may be especially true if he went through an ugly divorce. If this is the case with the guy you are interested in, the important thing is to not push him.
If you want the relationship to be successful, the last thing you’ll want to do is to compare yourself to his ex-wife. Don’t ask about how she was in bed or how she treated him in the happier days. A divorced man doesn’t want to think about these things.
These are all clear signs of jealousy and you’ll want to work those out between you and your new partner. Keeping tabs on a woman he no longer desires to be with only makes things harder for you.
Finally, the best thing to do, is to give him time and space to clear his mind, and probably focus on being friends. If it’s meant to be special eventually, you’ll be the first one to know…