January 18, 2016 Harriet Brookes

First kiss & first date…

When you have your first date you have one question  that makes you wonder : to kiss or not to kiss? When should the first kiss happen on a date? How can you avoid rejection when going in for a kiss on a date? If you have been obsessing about this every time you are out on a date, maybe it is time to deal with the issue head on.

Kissing is sweet… and fun and exciting, especially when you are doing with someone you find   yourself attracted to. And yet the first date is really more about getting to know a persona rather than locking lips right away. Essentially whether or not to kiss depends on what your or your partner’s dating priorities are.

However if you are sure you want to kiss your partner on the very first date, the next thing to consider is whether he/she is equally eager to do so. To decide this you will need to look closely at your partner’s behavior through the evening. Is he/she constantly brushing against you with their hands, legs or thighs? If a woman is trying to make eye contact, batting her eyelids or fluttering her eyelashes at you, then chances are, she is trying to get you to read her willingness. All these are signs of flirtation and if a partner is unabashedly indulging them on a date, it is definitely a green signal to you to go ahead and plant that kiss.

The right time

First date kisses usually happen when the guy is dropping his partner off on her doorstep or she is saying good night in the car. Also it is conventional for the man to make the first move. If you are a guy, time your kiss well, so that your partner does not disappear indoors before you have been able to work up the courage to kiss her. On the other hand if you are a woman, take things slowly and don’t be in a rush to close the door on your guy’s face before he has had a chance to kiss you.

The progression to the kiss has to feel natural to both you and her. You have to build momentum and gradually create tension with physical contact throughout the date. It’ll be awkward if you haven’t even touched once and then suddenly go in for a kiss…

Tips for a perfect first kiss

1.A first kiss should not be too unexpected. You should first have tried a little touching, maybe of hands and of waist, and tried some eye contact – if they were comfortable with that, and did not pull away or look away, then they should be OK with being kissed. Asking for a first kiss can feel awkward, so mostly if the moment feels right just go for it. But if you feel that you should ask, don’t say “Can I kiss you ?”. Go with something like “What would you do if I kissed you right now ?”

2.Keep a first kiss easy and simple and enjoy it. And no food or gum in your mouth. Do not try rushing to prove you are a kissing expert…

3.There is no perfect time. It may be before the first date or it may not be until you have known each other for a few weeks. Moreover, even if the connection is there, she has to be willing to kiss you. You have to wait for everything – the attraction and the willingness – to line up perfectly.

4.She gets really close: There is a certain distance that women will keep when they are not ready to kiss you, but when they are ready, they will start to move closer to you – particularly in the upper region. So, if she leans in more than usual, or stands closer to you, or somehow makes sure her face is ridiculously close to yours, then go in for the kiss.

5.Lick her lips: This is a sign that she is focused on her lips – and she doesn’t focus on her lips unless she is focused on using her lips for something, like a kiss. Plus most people lick their lips when they are getting ready for a first kiss.

 

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